Khuch meri kahani .....

Few words about me and myself....

"Sometimes it takes a whole life time to know someone.Sometimes all it takes is just a look"

  It really sounds so simple that one can say a lot about his/herself once given a chance but trust me it’s not. When the first time I tried to write down something about me , I was completely lost that from where i should start and where finish. I could manage to write just a few lines only.

 If you have already visited here, you must have read something about me. It took me a while to figure out what and how to write something about me. Well here is what I have come up with. It’s not complete of me but still I have tried to tell you about me as much I can in some lines and paragraphs. So what’s coming next is most of me….      

Who am I?

I am Mallika Jathan  I live in one of the most beautiful cities MumbaiI have been using and doing this computer stuff from around 4Years  if memory serves correctly.

I was born in MumbaiI have spent my entire childhood over there only, schooling and college too.

About My Educational Life

I shall start with revealing a little secret. Mostly people around me think that I am so much intelligent. I never could understand why because there is never anything that I did so that I can feel the same too.

My Interests

• Music

 Music is one of the most powerful mediums which effect one’s soul to the deepest    levels. I am a music-buff. Basically I like all kinds of music. But what I am going to hear, it depends on my mood. In general, all type of music are my favorites except Rock. I don’t like Rock much. In specific, I like soulful, melodious music with lyrics which touch heart and soul.

Some of my favorite songs are a mix from both old and new times. “Tum meri bahon mein aa na sake”,”Tumse mujhe pyar kyun ho gaya”, if just to name 1 or 2. In old songs, there are so many like “Tere bina zindagi se shikwa”,”Ya dil ki suno”.”No body wants to be lonely”, “Words”, “ Spanish Guitar” and many many more from English tracks.

• Movies & Television

I don’t watch much of them. Whenever I am free, I love to watch comedies, martial-arts movies, romantic movies and cartoon movies too. I don’t watch science fictions much. Some of the most favorites movies are “Mohbbaten”, “DDLJ” , “Baby’s day out” , I don’t watch television much. Whenever I am watching it, you can catch me watching music channels, news, Dicovery Channel , Cartoon Network and Disney Channel. I don’t watch daily soaps much. Yes game shows, talk shows, music shows, definitely are a no-miss for me.

• Reading

I read a lot. Magazines, comics, novels, story books, articles, blogs, anything. Yes now when I have started learning I like novels from Sidney Sheldon, Sophie Kinselly. Apart from that love stories and poetry are food for my reading appetite. My favorite book is “The other side of me”.

How I Spend My Time

 you can find me sitting in front of my pc surfing the net. I love to stumble upon sites of my interest. Mostly they all are related to humor, jokes, poetry or random articles about life, love. I love to read so it’s a good way for me of spending my time.

If I don’t feel like sitting on pc or doing nothing at all, than I go to Café Coffee Day and sit over there, sipping hot or cold coffee, whichever I feel like having. Again they have a good collection of magazines so I try them once for sure. If wont be reading than will just sit and watch people. It’s the best thing to do. There is always something happening in front of you to make you smile.

If I am not on internet or not in Café Coffee Day than look for me in some park sitting on the bench. That time, I am just with my self, thinking about myself, what I have done, planning about future or sometimes just sitting with myself doing and thinking nothing at all.

You must be thinking up till now, all of the things that I have told, I didn’t reveal anything about me being with my friends, hanging out with them or anything like that. Well let me clear all the doubts, I love to meet new people and make friends and I have a long list of them. I am lucky that I have so many people who love me so much .Whenever I get time, I am with some of my closest pals. But if no one is around, well I told you where I shall be?

Where I See Myself In Future?

Future is really something which can’t be defined and bounded in any boundaries. Its certainly can’t be decided too. Yes I have some plans and goals that I have decided for me but its better to keep them a secret for now. Lets see where life takes me? Yes whatever I shall be doing, I guarantee you that it will be with full passion and dedication.

My Mantra for Life

My life and my self are not really limited to one thing or aspect. I love to learn new things, expanding my horizon of knowledge in every aspect. Life is so short and this world is so big. There is so much out there to learn. My mantra for life is that believe in your self , stay focused and keep going. If you know what you are doing is not wrong than don’t be afraid from doing it ever.Have faith in yourself and on God.Value your relations and people in them. Help those who need you. Give smiles and spread happiness as much you can and it will come back to you in doubles. 

Wait I have something About You too....

By all this while, I have come to know about you too something. You have a lot of patience that you read till this line. Hope I didn’t bore you. Thanks a lot for stopping by.

Tough Time

I am not able to post anything over here from the last few days.To tell the truth, I am not able to do anything.There is some problem on the personal side.I wont say what but yes its so much big for me.Just praying so much hard that everything must go fine and wel

You don't think life is full of burden but we like to live it in that manner only so much frustration on work in studies in family conflicts then also we like it in that way. I cant understand why people say life is beautiful as it come with so-much! tensions!. 

People say that life is god gift but why god gives us so much burden that we cant enjoy our life properly but then also i like it.what do u think about this?did life is burden given by god to us. I believed its hard to live life but there is no another option.....

Is it Nesscary to get Married ?

friends and lot of friends in the life to help us when in need...every thing is available at finger tips now a days .everything means everything.in such a life getting married to somebody whom you know or dont know later finding them difficult to bear and curse for the rest of life .is it necessary..marraige?what do you think?

Sometimes it feels that you are so much sad.  You know the reason sometimes and some times you have no idea why you are feeling like that.  But yes it doesn't matter you know the reason or not, you are not in your own at this kind of time.  It feels that some thing inside is broken, something inside is hurting so much!That pain, that feeling is something which is not explainable in words.  Tears lie just at the corner of  the eyes but don't come out.  Eyes don't seem to cry but heart does the same!If tears come from the eyes, at least one can wipe them but what you would do for the tears that come from the heart?I don't know why this happens?If you ask me that whether I am in this state at the moment when I am writing this, I wont lie saying no.  Yes I am and whether I know the reason/answer of this, I shall say that may be I know too.  But still I am not sure why it is?May be its coz of that too much thinking and trying to get deep into of the matters or may be its just lack of my understanding?I really am not sure why?

A New Beginning....??????

Marriage is one of the most happiest and life changing events that can happen to one in his/her life.  There is no strength,no joy which can be compared to that trust,assurance that someone is with you,no matter what will be the time,conditions and circumstances may be!That strength one gets when he/she ties knot with his/her soulmate.

 

What You Always See Is Not Always True....

Today someone came up to me with a situation.  It was a relationship problem of his friend who unfortunately was not so lucky in love and had her heart broken.  After listening to the whole situation, it turned out to me that somewhere, there was some fault of that gal too.  I know it hurts so much and  I understand completely what she must be feeling at the moment but still if she would had acted in a different manner for some matters, things could be much more easier for her today.  I hope everything goes fine with her and she get herself recovered as soon as possible.  After hearing the whole situation, when I said to that person that that gal had some fault too, he didn't like it very much as she is very close to him.  He said that she is not wrong anywhere and don't say that she is at any fault.  But I guess if you are asking for an opinion, you must make yourself ready for any good/bad opinions that may come up along the way.  It is not always that you will hear favorable things only for you and/or for your closed ones.  Anyways things didn't go much smooth and at the end that person left saying this to me that you will understand her situation only when you would face the same.  I shall see what you would do at that time?

I shall not say much but just this only that don't think that the person sitting next to you never faced anything bad/painful in his/her life.  It may be possible that he/she is smiling so much from the face but that smile is not true. You can never judge for sure and can never say with an authority that only your pain is the biggest and worst.  It is very likely possible that the person next to you too had seen/faced ,if not more, the same amount of pain for him/herself.  Try to see beyond those shining eyes.  May be you will find some hidden tears somewhere in them too. Remember , what you always see, it is not always true

A Feeling expressed in some words....

There are some emotions and feelings which cant be described with anything.  Still some words, when put together, they give those feelings a face, a shape.  Following words are not written by me.  I got them from a friend but I liked the wordings so much so thought I would share it with you all.  Its in Hindi language but I shall explain the meaning in English too.  These are the emotions of a guy who is trying to express his feelings after got a heart break from his beloved.  Just try to feel the pain underneath these words.  Have a read:

Mere pyar se inkar hai tumko,

Lekin jab duur chala jaunga to yaad aunga!

Tere har dukh mein main shareek hona chahta tha,

Akele jab gamon mein ghir jaogi to yaad aunga!

Tere ashq main apni palkon par utha leta tha,

Hath se khud jab inhen pochhongi to yaad aunga!

Apne dukh mujh ko suna kar tum dil ko halka kar leti thi,

Apne gam jab khud ko hi sunaogi to yaad aunga!

Meri badkismati kar diya tune duur mujhko,

Koi naya humsafar jab banaogi to yaad aunga!

Mere pyar ko na tum samajh saki,

Mere dil se tumne khilwad kiya,

Kisi se jab khud thokar khaogi to yaad aunga!

Teri bewafai ka gum lekar hum to dunia chod chale,

Khud apne pyar ki jab chita jalaogi to yaad aunga!

Mere pyar se inkar hai tumko,

Lekin jab dur chala jaunga to yaad aunga!

And the meaning of these lines in English is as follows:

You don't want to accept my love,

But when I shall go far away than you will remember me!

I want to be a part of every pain of yours,

But when you will suffer alone than you will remember me!

I never let a tear even drop from your eyes and wiped all,

Now when you will sit and cry alone than you will remember me!

You always felt light by heart by sharing every pain with me,

Now when you will share it with just yourself only than you will remember me!

Its my bad luck that you have broken my heart,

When you will find someone new than you will remember me!

You never understood my love, you played with my heart,

When someone will do the same to you than you will remember me,

I am leaving this world with pain of your betrayal in your heart,

When you will bury your love yourself than you will remember me!

I shall conclude by saying this only that its so easy to be in a relation and its even more easier to break it.  If there is anything that is hard to do is to be in that relation and maintain its essence.Beaking someone's heart and thinking that it will be fine after some time coz with time every wound heals is not the answer and excuse.  If you have got someone who loves you so much, cares for you more than him/herself than do not think that he/she is a stupid person.  He/she is doing this coz he/she loves you more than anything and anyone else in this world.  Do not let go that person on any cost coz life is not so much generous.  That person who is loving this much today that he/she sees this world from your eyes and you don't realize his/her love,his/her worth and don't respect his/her love,his/her feeling and above all, you don't respect that person,you never know if someday he is not there anymore.  That day there is nothing else that you will be able to do except to think and cry about him/her.  These lines from a movie song explain this in a much better way.  Have a read:

Chahe jo tumhen pure dil se,

Milta hai who mushkil se!

Aisa jo koi kahin hai,

Bas wo hi sab se hasin hai

Us haath ko tum thaam lo,

Wo meherban kal ho naa ho!

And the meaning in English is as follows:

That someone who loves you more than himself,

Its so hard to find a person like that in this world!

If there is someone like this anywhere for you,

He is the most beautiful person in this whole world!

Hold that persons hand and never let him go,

May be tomorrow that person is not there anymore!

How much do you think these lines are true, tell me.  Isn't it true that we never know what we were missing until it arrives and we never know what we have lost until the time we don't lose it

Few words....Again!

As I said before when I wrote Few Words   and Once Again that I am no where even near to be an artist and not trying to be too.  What ever is there in these lines, it is just what my heart says and feels about somethings. For me, it just giving words to my feelings so if there is some thing that is not right or doesn't make sense in an artistic way than just assume, it was never intended to be like that at the first place. Do let me know your comments for sure, good and bad, both are equally welcome.

I still remember the first day we met,

I still remember the first words you said!

I was alone, never met love ever before,

You came, it felt as a wave met the shore!

I felt contended, I felt complete,

You were my every wish, everything I ever need!

We started a journey  holding hands,

Life became heaven as touched by a magic wand!

There was happiness, there were only smiles,

With you, endless dreams I set in my eyes!

Everywhere was shine of dreams, warmth of those smiles,

But I forgot, dreams shatter too with the sound of cries!

We made a promise of being together forever,

You broke it when you said, you loved me never!

You changed your path, said we have to get apart,

Left me behind with the pieces of my crushed heart!

Those pieces now drop through these lonely eyes,

They will never stop, no matter how hard I shall try!

 

After so long....

Some times it happens that you like something/someone so much and just can't live without that thing/person.  It can be anything.  It doesn't matter that it has to be a person only, it can be a song/place/piece of jewelry/anything & everything.  It happens with all of us isn't it? I am sure there must be something/someone without which/whom you too can't live without.  If you don't have yet anyone/anything which is having this special place in your heart/life than just wait.  Very soon it will come to you  coz you never know what you were missing till it doesn't come to you and you never realize what you have lost till the time it already has left you.  Ifyou don't have anyone yet, just wait and watch coz you will come to know only when he/she would  be in front of you to amaze you.  Trust me its going to happen and it will.

Yes we all have or once had something/someone which we liked the most/loved so much.  But its not a must that what we love/like must like us too.  Sometimes life takes a turn and everything becomes dark, so much painful and what you at times liked/loved so much, you get scared to your wits to even come near to that person/thing.  Even flowers start hurting,even air starts ripping the body and this world' eyes start penetrating the soul.  Worst conditions happen when someone is emotional.  Yes I know we all are emotional but you know some are more than others, who take everything on themselves, think and cry for what happened.  This happens with those who are like this.  Am I like that?Hmm cant say?Or should I say GUESS :-)?What I am going to tell you, read it and decide for yourself.

There were 2 songs that I used to like so much. I mentioned one in my websites also, it is Gori Teri Aankhen Kahen. The other is a pop album, aankhiyon k jharakhon se  I used to like them so much.  The first one was the first song that I dedicated to someone and made that person hear it.  Its from Lucky Ali.  The lyrics are very touching and video of it is also very heart-touching.  Luckily, that person liked it too. The other is a pop-album, having a variety of songs with title song, aankhiyon k jharakhon se  Very sweet, melodious song.  It has beautiful numbers, all very nice and sweet.  Then as I said before, somethings happen which turn your life upside and down. Sort of like that happened with me too.  After it I stopped listening to these 2 songs/albums altogether.  Its going to be almost 2 years today that I didn't hear them.  But I was wrong in doing so.  Someone very close to me made me hear them again yesterday and I did hear them. It brought back a lot of memories but I did listen both of these songs and promised that I shall listen them forever now. Sometimes we, with ourselves are not capable enough for doing something.  We need someone to hold our hands and make us stand/walk again. I did something like this yesterday when I heard these songs again.

I shall conclude by saying this, yes it does hurt at times when you look and long to see a moment to cherish, a moment to bring a smile on your face.  If you find that moment, you are very lucky.  Enjoy that moment fully.  But if you cant find it, than too don't lose heart. Sometimes things get rough.  But don't keep you away from those little things that you know can make you smile. Whose presence is as much important as anything else can be.  One of my friends said this to me and its really true,the sun is still somewhere shining even though it rains at somewhere else. So true isn' it?